The safest place in the world in the event of a nuclear war

(by Pablo Burgués)

Look out! I’m not saying this, it was indeed told by the respectable British newspaper The Guardian. Later, the city council of Sant Joan de Sa Talaia (Ibiza) adopted this statement and with the goal of promoting tourism in this area they wrote a press release asserting that: “The French physicist and astrologer declared in the XV century that, in the event of a nuclear war, the special air streams of Ibiza would turn this place into the last location where life could exist”.

Without considering whether advertising Ibiza as the Mediterranean bunker is a crazy idea or not, what I ask myself is: Did Nostradamus really say this? Because apparently the island is not mentioned in any of his texts… Thus, what is the basis for these gentlemen to state this? Let’s see…

Michel of Nôtre-Dame, alias Nostradamus, was born in Franceland on 14 December 1503. He studied the degree of Medicine and became a leading figure in the fight against the plague. But apparently the guy got bored with all that issue of healing people and soon he began to get tangled up with occultism. He found that what he really enjoyed was to foresee the future and in 1550, without even blushing, he wrote his first prophetic texts.

I don’t know if the guy got it right or not, but his technique reading the horoscope soon became popular among the high society of the times, and thanks to this he made a very good living. But he really busted out in 1555 when he published his best seller “Les Prophéties”, a work that predicted the future of the world until 3797, the year of the supposed apocalypse.

Why was and still is this book successful? We should remember that at that time there was a nice thing called Inquisition. Its job was to clear up all the heretics. To avoid this, Nostradamus wrote his prophecies in a very cryptic way, using plays on words, metaphors and enigmatic sentences. This was a great goal, because this way anybody can see in his writings whatever one feels like… that the Betis football club will win the Champions league, that Donald Trump is your parents… or that Ibiza is the anti-aircraft shield of the world.

I’m not very fond of prophecies, but, well, taking into account that the international political arena is not good at the moment and the weather in the Pitiusan islands is superb, I’ve decided that by now I’m staying here and may Nostradamus help us.

By the way, in spite of his fortune teller gifts, our friend did not foresee the heart attack that stopped him in 1556. He was buried under the epitaph: “Here lie the mortal remains of the most illustrious Michel Nostradamus, the only praiseworthy man, in the opinion of all people, to write with an almost divine pen, under the stars influence, the future of the world”. As you see, a very modest guy.

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Translation: Dora Sales